A bear pays me a visit
I'm above the Great Lakes, in Canada now, and last night I couldn't find an available hotel room anywhere from Rossport to Marathon along the Trans-Canada Highway. Marathon, Ontario is the last city of any size for about 60 miles, and the road was foggy, completely dark now, and wet from the heavy rain. A guy literally scooped the last hotel room in town right out from under me (he could get out of his car faster than I could get off the bike and take my helmet off). So I went to the local campground, even though setting up a tent in the dark and rain is no fun. What else could I do? I got it set up and got into the sleeping bag and went to sleep right away - I was tired.
I woke up when I felt something hit my foot hard and heard a sound of heavy breathing and wheezing. I was still in a sleep daze... a moose? Then a paw about the size of my head was outlined through the sheer tent fabric as it hit again. Instant awake now, because there is a bear outside. It pawed at the tent one more time, making the entire tent spring up and down. I think I hit at the paw, but I don't really remember, I was so panicked. I had taken my bags into the tent, and there was food and laundry detergent, and all the other strong-smelling things that you're not supposed to bring in. The bear must have had its nose literally on the tent, because that's all I heard: a sort of snuffling and snorting, very loud, almost sucking sound. It pawed at the tent again, and I thought, "I'll throw the bags outside and let it rip those up - maybe it will go away then." My new tent has the world's loudest zipper, which can be a real pain late at night when it's quiet, but I think that's what saved me. I opened up the inner tent zipper super fast (with the rain fly still closed) and the "rrrRRRRRZZZZIPPP" noise of the zipper must have scared it off.
I sat there shaking and moaning for a minute, unsure of whether it was gone or just sitting outside, then took out my cell phone to check the time (I already knew I didn't have a signal, otherwise I would have called 911). Bad news: it was only a little past midnight, so I was going to be there for a long time. I'm agnostic in general, but I was a fervent Christian in that tent, begging, "please God, don't let it come back." After scribbling a few minutes in my journal to calm myself and try to think straight, I spent the entire night sitting up with my head in my hands, listening to every sound of the rain and wet forest outside. My back hurts just thinking about the tension. Every drop of water dripping off a tree leaf sounds like a footstep. Multiply that times a forestful of trees, then add in every other animal's night sounds.
At about 4AM, I packed up everything in the tent, including the sleeping bag, and put on my motorcycle suit and waited for daylight. I figured if the suit can protect against impacts and abrasion in a crash, it might help protect me from an attacking bear. I had my helmet right next to me, too. I waited through the false dawn until I could see my motorcycle outside, then I broke camp faster and more efficiently than I will ever be able to do again. My head was on a swivel the whole time.
I've never been more happy to be on the road. I stopped at the gas station and was instantly nervously jabbering with the lady tending the pumps. "A bear, a bear! Hee hee, he almost got me!" She barely raised her eyebrows. "Yeah, we got so many, we get them coming into the parking lot at the mall." "The government stopped the spring bear hunt to keep from orphaning cubs, and ever since then there's been a population explosion - they've counted thirty of them at the local dump." The campsite (run by the Lions Club) had no mention on the bulletin board of any bear problem. It was my own fault, a total brain fart, but it would have been nice to have SOME warning that, oh by the way, this area is overrun with 600-700 lb. black bears.
To top things off, I got a speeding ticket this afternoon, and no amount of pleading or begging the lady Ontario Province Police officer made any difference. I told her about the bear, and that I had a lot on my mind, and I let the speed get too high on accident, etc... the bitch was having none of it. I have to pay $280 Canadian that I don't have, and heading north to Canada is looking like a bad idea in retrospect. Both bad things are my own fault and could have been prevented, which only makes them worse.
I've decided that I need to catch the downhill spiral of my trip right away. Needless to say, I'm not camping tonight. I'm in a nice three-star hotel in downtown Rouyn-Noranda, Quebec, which is extravagant compared to the rest of my accomodations. I'm treating myself to a nice hotel in a nice town and a nice meal. Perspective also helps: I've had a bad 24 hours, after ten or so positively perfect days. That's not a bad ratio! Hell, now I have a story to give my future grandkids nightmares!
And I'm never going to bring anything except a sleeping bag, an air mattress and a flashlight into any tent ever again.
I woke up when I felt something hit my foot hard and heard a sound of heavy breathing and wheezing. I was still in a sleep daze... a moose? Then a paw about the size of my head was outlined through the sheer tent fabric as it hit again. Instant awake now, because there is a bear outside. It pawed at the tent one more time, making the entire tent spring up and down. I think I hit at the paw, but I don't really remember, I was so panicked. I had taken my bags into the tent, and there was food and laundry detergent, and all the other strong-smelling things that you're not supposed to bring in. The bear must have had its nose literally on the tent, because that's all I heard: a sort of snuffling and snorting, very loud, almost sucking sound. It pawed at the tent again, and I thought, "I'll throw the bags outside and let it rip those up - maybe it will go away then." My new tent has the world's loudest zipper, which can be a real pain late at night when it's quiet, but I think that's what saved me. I opened up the inner tent zipper super fast (with the rain fly still closed) and the "rrrRRRRRZZZZIPPP" noise of the zipper must have scared it off.
I sat there shaking and moaning for a minute, unsure of whether it was gone or just sitting outside, then took out my cell phone to check the time (I already knew I didn't have a signal, otherwise I would have called 911). Bad news: it was only a little past midnight, so I was going to be there for a long time. I'm agnostic in general, but I was a fervent Christian in that tent, begging, "please God, don't let it come back." After scribbling a few minutes in my journal to calm myself and try to think straight, I spent the entire night sitting up with my head in my hands, listening to every sound of the rain and wet forest outside. My back hurts just thinking about the tension. Every drop of water dripping off a tree leaf sounds like a footstep. Multiply that times a forestful of trees, then add in every other animal's night sounds.
At about 4AM, I packed up everything in the tent, including the sleeping bag, and put on my motorcycle suit and waited for daylight. I figured if the suit can protect against impacts and abrasion in a crash, it might help protect me from an attacking bear. I had my helmet right next to me, too. I waited through the false dawn until I could see my motorcycle outside, then I broke camp faster and more efficiently than I will ever be able to do again. My head was on a swivel the whole time.
I've never been more happy to be on the road. I stopped at the gas station and was instantly nervously jabbering with the lady tending the pumps. "A bear, a bear! Hee hee, he almost got me!" She barely raised her eyebrows. "Yeah, we got so many, we get them coming into the parking lot at the mall." "The government stopped the spring bear hunt to keep from orphaning cubs, and ever since then there's been a population explosion - they've counted thirty of them at the local dump." The campsite (run by the Lions Club) had no mention on the bulletin board of any bear problem. It was my own fault, a total brain fart, but it would have been nice to have SOME warning that, oh by the way, this area is overrun with 600-700 lb. black bears.
To top things off, I got a speeding ticket this afternoon, and no amount of pleading or begging the lady Ontario Province Police officer made any difference. I told her about the bear, and that I had a lot on my mind, and I let the speed get too high on accident, etc... the bitch was having none of it. I have to pay $280 Canadian that I don't have, and heading north to Canada is looking like a bad idea in retrospect. Both bad things are my own fault and could have been prevented, which only makes them worse.
I've decided that I need to catch the downhill spiral of my trip right away. Needless to say, I'm not camping tonight. I'm in a nice three-star hotel in downtown Rouyn-Noranda, Quebec, which is extravagant compared to the rest of my accomodations. I'm treating myself to a nice hotel in a nice town and a nice meal. Perspective also helps: I've had a bad 24 hours, after ten or so positively perfect days. That's not a bad ratio! Hell, now I have a story to give my future grandkids nightmares!
And I'm never going to bring anything except a sleeping bag, an air mattress and a flashlight into any tent ever again.
posted by Dusty at 8:13 PM
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